October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. I have a church member-friend-inspiration who has a non-profit organization that is all about Domestic Violence, and last year I had the opportunity to attend the organization’s annual brunch for the first time.
Her Voice is a mentorship program that supports victims of domestic violence in the first 2 years after they leave their abuser, since this is when they are most vulnerable to return to the situation.
My eyes were truly opened, and I realized that as a physician, I felt unprepared to handle this incredibly important topic. Sure, I knew I was supposed to be asking if my patients felt safe in their homes, but what was I supposed to do if they said no? So I’m sad to say hadn’t been doing my part.
I promised myself I was going to do better, in part because Dr. Shana made is very aware that ending Domestic Violence was each of our personal responsibilities. But I’m ashamed to say after a few failed attempts at trying to put a tool kit of resources together, and a few struggles of my own, I let this important topic fall to the back burner.
Well, here we are again, a year later, and I am at this fantastic event again. The transparency was unparalleled as the emcee shared that she, too was a victim of domestic violence and was having to work through some of her feeling surrounding being central in the event.
Dr. Shana defined domestic violence as “a systematic way of destroying a [person] from the inside out.” She also hit us with some very troubling statistics. Every 9 seconds a woman is abused. One out of every 3 women (and one out of every 4 men) will experience domestic violence in their lifetime. And Harris county, the county in which we reside, leads Texas in domestic violence homicides. I actually had to look this up , guys. And what I found troubling is that this has been a pattern since at least 2015—and as she said, this is NOT where you want to be #1.
We later heard from one of Her Voice’s mentors, a domestic violence survivor, who shared her story of survival. Truly touching she shares how she “wanted and needed to be loved.” How she “thought she’d found Mr. Perfect”, and he had a broken past, and “she wanted to help him” but he flipped the script on her. His mom was even in on it, and tried to tell her how she could be have to try to avoid the abuse. It finally ended, but she almost lost her life. As she says, she finally realized that “Love does not hurt you, degrade you, mistreat you, or isolate you.” She is now in a loving relationship, and her husband was there to support her, beaming with pride as she shared her story, a perfect example of the theme of the the event: Shattered, but silent no more.
So the beginnings of a tool kit:
713-528-2121—Domestic Violence
Houston Area Women’s Center Shelter
Houston Area Women’s Center Counseling
List of Houston Area Resources
Also, I don’t want to forget to tell my Houston area people that there is a concert hosted by Men Against Domestic Violence later this month. For more information click here.
Domestic Violence is a silent killer. 1 in 3 women, guys. That means if you don’t know anyone, it’s just because she hasn’t told you. So if you’re worried about your friend, ask some questions, without judgment. Let her know you’re there for her. Share some resources.
Whose responsibility is it to stop domestic violence?
MINE!!