I have some feelings… Woman

I am so happy for everyone else that they are finding this quarantine time a time to slow down and be more productive. Focus on themselves. Focus on their goals. Whatever. Yep, you heard it. While I’m happy, I’m also, a little…irritated..that it hasn’t worked out that way for me.

Yeah, I know. I signed up for this. It also doesn’t make it easy to see everyone posting about lounging in pajamas, having no where to go, getting fat on snacks, being bored, while I’m literally more tired than I’ve been in a while trying to give my children more time because they have more time while mommy has less time, because now she has to clean, make sure they have 3 meals instead of 1, learn constantly about a brand new illness, attend (virtually) no less than 3-4 meetings weekly about said illness, while continuing my previous workload.

So while y’all are complaining—I kinda want y’all to—stop. Practice some gratitude 😘. Because I would do something strange for a week—or 4—in pajama pants unable to leave my house. If I could be bored just once (I actually don’t think I’ve ever been bored left to my own devices). I’m an introvert, y’all. That sounds positively glorious!! (Minus the kids of course…but even with them, we could make this thang work😂). But I’m trying to check myself…I am. I signed up for this. I did this to myself. And…gratitude, right.

So, I’m grateful to be employed. There are so many who have lost their jobs and are struggling. I don’t get to be upset when I can support my family. I have responsibilities at home because I am not quarantined alone, and don’t have to worry about getting lonely. I am able to feed my children. I am able to help others rather than being completely helpless during this time. I am cleaning this beautiful house I for which I prayed so long. And I said I don’t get to be upset. That’s wrong. I get to have feelings. I don’t get to wallow in them. Because I have a lot to be grateful for.

4 Replies to “I have some feelings… Woman”

  1. I have taken this time to start back doing a daily list of things I’m grateful for. April is my birthday month so I committed to doing at least 30 days for the month of April and 44 items a day since I’m grateful to be turning 44. You are right in turning alllllll the feelings back to gratefulness! It’s the key to making it through; appreciating all we have already overcome and been blessed with always outweighs fears of the unknown. Besides, it’s impossible to be sad, scared or any low-vibrational emotion when focused on gratitude! Thank you for being an example!

  2. I get it. All this newfound “free time” creates pressure to perform in other ways – ways we haven’t for years. It’s become even more acute for moms. Small children don’t see laying in bed watching TV as their idea of a good time. So we’re working triple time to educate, entertain, and emotionally support. And the men in our lives, as wonderful as they are…haven’t changed. They are making a few more assumptions about what we’re capable of doing, though…😒 All that to say, I feel you. 🙏🏾

  3. I especially identify with this one. I am praying for you my Granddaughter ( who is a physician), and all Health Care Professionals. I pray for all the Service people who are sacrificing so much to give the needed services to this Country and all over the World. God bless you .

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