Restoration: Four Steps I’m Taking

I’ve done a couple of presentations on restoration of your physical health (shout out to H3W Women’s Wellness Workshops), and so I know a little bit about the topic.

Turns out, the definition of restore is to return something to its former condition, state or position; repair or renovate.

Well let me tell you something—at the beginning of 2022, I found myself in a state where I could use some restoration, okay. I lost my grandmother, my uncle, several close patients to COVID, had been going through a tumultuous experience that I won’t discuss at this point, and was beginning to have severe migraines again (likely due to the stress) which also does something to me emotionally, because, truthfully, as much as I’m grateful for the way that experience shook me up and got me on the right path, I was traumatized by the experience of having a migraine that lasted for 6 months. So yeah.

Here I am in Jan 2022—a whole mess. Reevaluating my whole life. Really. And its confirmed that I’ve got to make some huge changes that I really have been avoiding—here’s that uncomfortable word LEAP. So I decided I had to say goodbye to my patients and start over. And it became abundantly clear during that time that whatever I did wasn’t going to look like what I was currently doing.

So, I gave notice, and began preparing myself to leave.

Let me tell you what happened.

First, I got to hear who I was in my patients’, my learners’ and my staff’s eyes. This is not something people typically do when they think they will have you all the time, but I started to hear how amazing people thought I was, how I had changed people’s lives, they felt I had saved their lives, I had made them feel special, how smart they thought I was, how special they thought I was. It was truly a gift. Because I am someone who typically doesn’t give myself credit. And while I certainly knew I was good at my job and that I gave them my all, I had no clue how much I had touched their lives. While I strive to continue to embody the humility that I was also praised for, I also want to own the greatness others see in me. I want to know what I’m capable of, and push to be greater.

Next, I had an overwhelming sense of loss. See, while I knew that this was the right decision for the right reasons, and I didn’t think I defined myself by my job, some piece of me apparently did. I lost a huge part of my identity when I walked away from that position. I lost 7 years of building a practice and a reputation. I mourned—and I felt stuck for a little bit.

But I was busy working on an anthology with some amazing ladies, so I kinda had to snap out of it…lol.

Then, I began to process, read, talk to God (I mean, we had been talking the whole time, but asking Him some different types of questions), read some more, hang with my family and friends, talk to God, read some more—and restoration.

I revisited some books I hadn’t read in a while. I started reading some new ones. And I realized some things needed to be addressed.

So let’s talk about restoration. In order to restore, you have to:

1. Assess to see what the problems are.
2. Deconstruct: Take it all apart—what’s working and not working. Why are the methods that I put in place before not working?
3. Clean/Repair/Replace—This is where you start to figure out what things you can do to fix what needs to be fixed. How can you change those methods make it shiny
4. Assemble—put it all together but make if fool proof—or try—everything is bound to have some problems.

So, I realized that I had back slid on a lot—from truly exercising with purpose to eating as healthfully as I should to organization around the house and in life—things needed to be addressed. I had already started to deconstruct some things—I mean, I quit my job, right? But also, I wasn’t managing to be as productive as I wanted to be without the job. So, what was going on? Enter 5 Second Rule, Zone of Genius, and Atomic Habits. Here is where the deconstruction and clean/repair/replace really began to take place. I remembered things that I had done that had worked, but realized why they hadn’t stuck, or why I had fallen off the wagon so to speak.

And I’m beginning to assemble myself into a new and improved version, ya hear me. One with improved focus, clarity of mind, better habits that support the outcomes I want, and who understands my greatness and what I’m capable of, but understands it means nothing if it’s not done in service—first to God, then to the man I promised before God to serve, then to those little people we brought into the world, until I’m no longer a steward over them, then to the rest of the world. But I can’t serve if this temple isn’t well maintained—so that’s important, too. Balance. Focus. Faith.

So question? Are you in a place where you could use a bit of restoration? Well let’s go back over the steps:

1. Assess: See where your problems are. Do so non-judgmentally. You don’t get anywhere by getting down on yourself because you’re not where you want to be, you just want to make neutral observations.
2. Deconstruct: What isn’t working? What self-limiting beliefs or myths might be holding you back from your goals?
3. Clean/Repair/Replace: Start coming up with the ways you can change the above
4. Assemble: Put together your plan. Anticipate ways it could go wrong and plan for that.

You got this!!